Columnist and trained counsellor Fiona Caine answers another reader dilemma.
When we adopted our daughter, 18 years ago, we thought it would be the most wonderful thing in the world. We knew she’d been through difficult times – she was eight when she came to us – but I know we didn’t appreciate just what we were letting ourselves in for. We now believe she had been abused in some way, although we weren’t told that at the time.
Don’t get me wrong, we loved her and were delighted to have her in our lives, but she was, to say the least, a challenge. We spent a lot of time looking for help and, for a time, things did improve – she came to trust us more and I really thought we’d turned a corner. That didn’t last long though, as she met a young man and I think he turned her against us.
She ran away to live with him, and as by this time she was 18, we couldn’t stop her. Inevitably she became pregnant but, because they were using drugs, the baby was put into foster care. I tried to get social services to let us look after the baby, but they wouldn’t.
She thought we…
