‘No second-hand kids’. This was the (entire) bio of one Tinder user I came across recently. I swiped left.
Rude but concise; surely this type of anti-single parent sentiment was a one-off and not to be found on the other dating apps? Especially the fancy ones, where you can match by star sign or political preference? Wrong. Dating as a single parent, I quickly learned, is a minefield, where the explosions encountered are usually not the good kind.
When I entered the dating pool following a significant timeout after splitting from the father of my child, who I had been with for twelve years, I wasn’t exactly hopeful. But what awaited me was worse than I feared. Dating after any long hiatus is tricky, and if you’re also navigating childcare issues, single parent stigma and coming from an experience of abuse or adultery, these are particularly rocky waters.
I learnt my lesson from ‘no second hand kids’ guy that leading with your kid on your online profile isn’t the best idea. So, when to reveal your ‘baggage’ to a potential partner? Once, I waited until mid-way…
